Operational bachelorette party. Comedy. А play for 5 people - Николай Владимирович Лакутин

Lisa (White, joyfully). I have heard that the residents of Penza are called Penzyuki!

The girls are laughing, all except Bela.

Damira (through laughter, Bele). So you're a Penza girl!

The girls burst out laughing even more. All except Bela.

Bela (a little offended, Lisa and the girls). I don't know who calls who where. Actually, as far as I know, men living in Penza are called penzentsy, women — penzenkami …

Girls (except Bela) are filled with a new wave of laughter.

Xana (through laughter, Bele). How-how? Penza?

Girls (except Bela) "ride" with laughter.

Bela (a little offended, to all the girls). Yes, you are Penza yourself! Peeeeensenkami. And the residents of Penza are called Penza residents, and not in some other way.

The girls are laughing, trying to calm down.

Bela, offended, mimics them. Ostentatiously deliberately "ha-ha-kaet", shows all the girls the tongue.

The girls are trying to calm down, but under a drunken bench, it's not so easy.

Bela (a little offended, to all the girls). And in general! It was a long time ago and not true. I've been a Muscovite since I was six! Practically indigenous! So there's nothing for me to do here!

Xana (in her own way, Bela). Okay, okay. Don't sulk. I just asked out of interest. Hushed up the question. (Xana switches to Damira.) And now let's popress Damira!

Bela, Lisa (in chorus, with drunken excitement). And davaaayte!

Damira looks warily at Xana.

Damira (to Xane, with a restrained hit-and-run). What has started? They were sitting normally!

Xana (in her own way, Damire). Missis, don't strain yourself like that. I just wanted to ask you about this one of yours… What's his name… Roman …, like, yes?

Damira (relieved to wave off, Xane). Oh, that's what you mean. Well, I think I've already told you everything.

Xana (cautiously, Damire). You started, but then we switched to another topic. I understand that the look of this Novel does not burn in your garden?

Damira (thoughtfully, a little sadly, to Xane). Not lit… I can't understand anything at all. If you have no interest in me, then why are you dating me? But we are meeting! We don't just meet, we live, we can say together!

Bela (sympathetically, Damire). Maybe there is interest, but he just shows it in some other way, not in the look?

Lisa (sadly, with understanding and some inner bitterness of her own). No, Bela, the look is very important. This may be the most important thing, among other things.

Damira (thoughtfully, a little sadly, to the girls). Wooooo! I think so too. From here I have a lot of questions.

Xana (cautiously, Damire). Well, how are you with him at all?

Damira (sincerely, Xane). Yes, it's kind of normal… He rented me an apartment, and we live there, in fact. But for some reason his things are at a minimum, basically everything is mine. He disappears at work all the time. He doesn't spend the night at home every day, however, he immediately warned about this. The specifics of the work. Business trips are frequent, trips to other regions, approvals, new offers, business expansion… Everything seems to be with him, as they say, and he treats me well. Attentive to details, respectful. He does not allow himself to raise his voice at me, and all that, although I admit I gave a reason.

Xana (suspiciously, Damire). He's very careful!

Damira (thoughtfully, a little sadly). Uh-huh…

Lisa (after a short pause, carefully, Damire). I'm sorry, please, but I think he has someone else besides you.

Damira casts a meek glance at Lisa. The girls are silent.

Damira pours herself alcohol. Fill up. Drinks.

Withstands a very short pause, casting a glance at the girls.

Damira (getting drunk in front of her eyes, smiling slyly). Maybe he has someone else… Maybe I have someone else… This is life, girls! It's like that here… So somehow… Something like that, in general.

Damira takes out her phone, dials Roman.

Damira (getting drunk in front of her eyes, into the phone, to Roman). Romulus? Hi. It's me. Yes. And why do you sound so sleepy? And… well, yes, it's night. Darling, do you know that I'm calling you? No, not because she's drunk. Although that's why too. I'm not just drunk, I'm practically in gov… (Hiccups.) But that's not the point. Romulus, do you love me? (Smiles, listening to the phone.) Say more. (Smiles, listening to the phone.) Are you at home now? M… will you pick me up? I'll send the address now.

He hangs up, writes the address in the phone, sends a message.

Bela (with interest, Damire). What? Will he come?

Damira (nodding, hiccupping). Romulus is fine!

Xana (exhaling, relieved, Damire). Well, then it's not as bad as it seems. Everything is almost good. Come on, Lady, get ready and don't forget to call Sergey tomorrow, about work!

Damira staggers off to get dressed.

Lisa (to the girls). Yes…, it's interesting they have everything there.

Lisa gets a text message. She picks up the phone, reads the text in surprise.

Bela and Xana look at Lisa with interest.

Xana (to Lisa with interest). Who's texting you at night?

Lisa (to the girls). I'm shocked myself! Buddy. We met on the Internet for quite a long time. We communicate. He's also from here, but we've never met him, and honestly, I'm not eager. It's fun to talk to him, but I don't want anything personal with him, not my passenger.

Bela (to Lisa with interest). And what does he write?

Lisa (reads the text aloud). Lisa! Find me a girl urgently! I can't really eat or sleep anymore! I twisted all my brains. I want a serious relationship with a normal girl, and all sorts of bitches come across! Don't you have a good, unspoiled girl in